It's not your fault
by anabuhnahnuh
Summary: The Walker family must deal with a very tragic event in their life when Angela is 5 years old. MATURE theme, may not be appropriate for all audiences. I tried to deal more with the emotions than with the M rated graphics.
1. UN0

It was about 6:00 on a cold November evening; Alex Walker, and her five-year-old daughter, Angela, walked out of the grocery store hand-in-hand. Alex was picking up several items for dinner that night. Alex listened intently as Angela told her mother about her day at the HOPE center.

"…and Mommy, guess what?"

"What sweetie?"

"We colored pictures today, and I drew you one for your office. It's in my pocket, see here…"

Angela stopped quickly to pull the picture out of her pocket. As she pulled it out, and continued walking, the picture got caught in her pocket and ripped in half. Angela suddenly broke down crying.

"I'm so sorry Mommy," She said with tears streaking down her face. "I really wanted you to have it. I worked so hard on it just for you."

By this time, they made it to Alex's white SUV and Alex had opened the door and put the bag of things in. She looked at her daughter, whose face was now tearstained. Alex looked down at her daughter and picked her up. She wiped Angela's face and looked into her little girl's eyes.

"It's okay sweetie pie, when we go home, you can draw me another one if you want to. If you want, I'll even sit down and color with you."

"Really? I love it when you color with me. You and Daddy are always so busy; y'all never have time for me. I love when you guys have time for me."

"What Angela?"

"Y'all are always so busy. I don't see y'all much. I stay at the HOPE center so much in the daytime, and at night I have to sleep."

"Yes sweetie, we do work, but I don't want you to think that work's _ever_ more important than you. You are the _most_ important thing in this world to us and we love you more than anything. I don't want to _ever_ hear of you thinking that something's more important than you. You are our miracle and our angel and we love you more than you could _ever_ know. How about I take tomorrow off, and we'll spend the day together, just you and me?"

"Really Mommy, That'll be so much fun. I love you."

"I love you too baby girl, but we need to get going so we can go home and color together. So get in your seat and buckle yourself in."

Angela hopped out of her mother's arms and into her child seat. She pulled the belt over her head and hooked it in. Alex checked to make sure Angela had buckled herself in safely, after doing so; she shut the back door and went to get in her seat. She buckled up and they started on their way home.

Unbeknownst to Alex, two men who had seen the two girls in the parking lot were following them. These men were rapists from Charleston, South Carolina. They had been known to rape white females ranging from toddlers to middle aged woman. They were being hunted by law enforcement in and around the Lowcountry area of South Carolina.

On the way home, Alex and Angela began to talk about what they would color pictures of when they got home.

"I want to draw a big house with pretty trees and flowers in front Mommy. Will you help me with it?"

"Of course sweetie, I'd be happy to help you."

Alex turned on a back road leading to their home. She came to a stop sign and stopped. As she did, the two men suddenly approached the back window across from Angela. Angela saw them and began screaming.

"MOMMY, There's two men trying to get me! Mommy, help!"

Alex turned around and saw them.

"Angela, unhook your belt and come here. Hurry!"

Alex quickly tried to help her daughter and dial her cell phone at the same time. Her efforts seemed futile and before she knew it the men were bashing the back passenger window. The moment they did that, Angela was able to get unbuckled and she hopped into the front seat into her mother's lap, who tried to get out of her door. Before she knew it the men grabbed Angela by her hair when Alex got the door open. Angela couldn't go and Alex wasn't about to leave her child. The man held a gun to Angela's head and told Alex to quietly and peacefully get in the back seat with her daughter. Alex began to cry and did as she was told, for she feared her daughter's life. She hopped over the seat, and sat in the back with Angela, quickly drying her tears as to try and keep Angela calm. One of the men then went back to their vehicle, and one got in the driver's seat of Alex's, threw out her phone and started on his way. The man told Alex to cooperate and he might let them live. Angela began to cry. The men told Alex to make her stupid kid shut up or he'd kill them both right there. Alex picked Angela up off the seat and sat her in her lap and simply held her close and whispered to her, telling Angela that it would all be okay, and that her daddy would come and get them and they'd all go home and color together. Angela began to quiet down as her mother held her close, stroking Angela's hair. Soon the other vehicle had been ditched and they stopped and the man got in the front seat of Alex's SUV.

-

It was now 8:00 and Walker was wondering where his girls were. "They should've been home an hour ago." He thought to himself. He calls Alex's cell phone and gets the standard message that her phone has been cut off. He begins calling around to see if anyone's heard from them.

-

After driving for a while in Alex's vehicle, the men decided they'd have to ditch it incase they were being looked for. They stopped at a diner and Alex begged them to let her and Angela go to the restroom. The men finally let them and told her that if she tried anything, the kid would suffer. That was all it took to keep Alex from doing anything. She carried her child to the restroom and straight back. The men had come up with a van when the girls got back outside. They opened the sliding door and ushered Alex and Angela in. Once they were on their way again, the men realized they didn't know who these people were.

"I forgot to introduce myself. My name's Wesley and this is my friend John. Who are you?"

"What's it matter?"

"It doesn't matter to me, but I bet it matters to that kid that you seem to be very attached to." Wesley said as he pointed the gun to Angela's head.

"My name's Alex and this is my daughter, Angela."

"Was that so hard?"

Alex ignored him and just sat there, holding Angela and staring out the window. Finally, after riding for another hour, Angela fell asleep in her mother's lap.

-

Walker had an APB put out on Alex's SUV. He found it at a diner outside of town. He went in showing pictures, asking if anyone had seen them. One of the waitresses said that she saw the two come in and use the facilities and leave. She also said that they both looked very scared, that the woman was carrying the girl and they didn't look anywhere near anyone except each other. One patron said she'd seen the two ushered into the back of a van by two men. Walker thanked them for their information and took off to looking for Alex and Angela again.

-


	2. D0S

They stopped another hour later. When they got out, Alex noticed the men had only taken them in circles around the Dallas area. They were at an old motel on the outskirts of town. John went and got the room while Wesley explained to Alex that she and Angela would get out and act as if nothing was wrong or he'd kill them. Alex did as she was told, all the while, carrying her sleeping child. Once they got in the room, it wasn't quite midnight.

"Wake up that kid of yours!" Wesley said.

Alex did as she was told. They had guns and she wasn't about to play with Angela's life.

Alex spoke quietly, softly. "Angela. Wake up sweetie. C'mon, open your eyes. Do it for mommy. Please."

Angela awoke and remembered what happened. She immediately buried her head in Alex's chest, terrified. Wesley yanked Angela off of Alex. Angela and Alex both cried out in protest. Wesley picked Angela up off the floor by her hair and threw her on the one queen size bed in the room. He told her to shut up or he'd kill her mommy.

"Strip your daughter, then yourself."

"NO!" screamed Alex.

"Fine, you wanna play that way, we'll do it your way."

John picked Alex up and threw her on the bed beside her daughter. "First you will watch us have our fun with her, and then we'll take care of you."

"The hell you will!" Alex said.

They came at Angela, Alex rolled over as quickly as she could, covering Angela with her body. Not one inch of Angela could be seen once Alex got herself over her daughter. Angela screamed and cried while Alex just laid there. It took the two men together 15 minutes to even be able to see any part of Angela because Alex was covering her so well, but her strength couldn't amount to theirs. Once they were able to see Angela's head, John held Alex's arm out of the way and Wesley held the gun to Angela's head.

"Get off her or her screaming will be the last thing you ever hear come out of her mouth."

Alex reluctantly did as she was told. "Now, sit right there on that side of the bed and watch."

"Please, take me. Take me instead. She's only five years old. Please take me instead." Alex begged and pleaded.

"Shut up lady. We will take you. But you're gonna watch us take her first since you gave us such a hard time."

"Please. No…"

Alex was cut off by the gun being put over Angela's heart. "I will pull this trigger and _then_ make you watch me if you do not shut up!"

Alex did nothing but cry. She was forced to watch as her daughter was violated in every possible way known to man. Her five-year-old daughter was going through things that Alex didn't even expect her to even be concerned about for at least another 10 years. They kept doing what they were doing to Angela until she passed out. Alex gently took her tiny hand in hers and held it. She simply cried.

"You're next lady!"

BOOM!

The door crashes open and in comes Walker with back up. Alex jumps over Angela to hide her body from all the people. Walker saw his daughter in one instant, his wife's face in the next. Then he saw the men aiming guns at him. In that one second, he knew what had happened. He shot and killed both of the men right there.

He instantly walked over to Alex and Angela. Alex was taking her overcoat and putting it around Angela to cover her. Walker looked at Alex and looked at Angela. He spoke to Angela, trying to awake her, she wouldn't wake up. She had a pulse though.

"Walker, I tried. I tried to stop them Walker. I tried. But I couldn't. They were too strong. I couldn't stop them Walker." Alex sobbed. "I'm so sorry Walker. I couldn't help her. I laid on her until they put a gun to her head. I really tried Walker!" Alex kept repeating herself in between sobs. "I know you tried honey. I know you did everything you could. It's not your fault. It's all gonna be okay." Walker tried to sooth her but he knew nothing he could say could make her feel any better. He held her as tight as he could. They both stood there staring at their daughter, tears rolling down both their faces. One of the policemen stuck his head in the door to say the EMTs were on their way.

Alex stood there holding onto Walker, when suddenly, she passed out. Walker grabbed her before she hit the floor. He laid her on the bed by Angela. His tears began to roll uncontrolled down his face. His daughter and just been raped and his wife was forced to watch. Now his wife had passed out from all the terror and shock she was going through. Walker grabbed Alex's hand and told her to wake up. She didn't. He looked to Angela, who still had the semblance of being asleep. He didn't want to wake her unless necessary because he knew she'd be in pain. He looked back to Alex. He got on his knees by the bed.

"Alex, please wake up. I need you. Please honey. I can't do this alone. Wake up sweetie. Alex, please get up. We have to take care of our baby. I can't do this without you Alex. I need you awake right now. Please get up." He continued to cry for the fear that he wouldn't be able to get his wife to wake up. He knew she wasn't going to die, but he didn't think he could make it through the night without her there with him, awake. He remembered that when she wouldn't get out of bed in the mornings, he could always kiss her, that special way, and she'd get up. He quickly leaned down, and kissed her passionately until she began to respond. When she did, she opened her eyes and saw his tear stained ones. She sat up as everything came rushing back to her memory.


	3. TRES

Alex looked at Walker, then to Angela. She did not say one word. Silent tears ran down her face. Walker sat beside her and gathered her into his arms and held her as she cried. They heard sirens approaching and before they knew it, two EMTs were in there picking Angela up and laying her on a stretcher. Walker and Alex got up and followed them into the back of the ambulance. Angela was immediately hooked up to all types of machines. Her parents sat on the long seat in the ambulance next to their daughter, who was on the stretcher. The EMTs had awakened her and she was crying.

"Mommy, Daddy," she said while crying, "I hurt. It hurts. Help me. Make it quit hurting. Please help me!"

"We're getting you help baby." Walker replied looking at her. "We're gonna get you help and you'll feel all better."

In Walker's left hand, his fingers were intertwined with Alex's, and in his right hand, he picked up Angela's left hand and held her hand. Alex had yet to speak since he had got her awake. He looked at her. He saw guilt, sadness, worry, and pain all etched across her face. He gently squeezed her hand. She looked at him and then down to their daughter. Her silent tears ran down her cheeks and Walker took his hand out of hers and put his arm around her and drew her to him. She put both of her arms around his waist and tucked her head into his left shoulder and her tears soaked his shirt. Before they knew it, they had arrived at the hospital.

Angela was admitted to the Children's Pediatric Unit where she was sedated to sleep while doctors checked her body over for any permanent damage. Alex and Walker stood out of the way in Angela's room while they watched doctors poke and prod at places on their daughter that made them cringe. Once they were done, a doctor ushered them out of the room to speak with them.

"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Walker, My name is Dr. Rogers. I will be Angela's doctor throughout her stay. Our preliminary tests indicate that Angela will be okay. She bled very badly from where she was penetrated. She has bruises from her lower stomach down to right above her knees. We've yet to establish if there's any permanent damage to her, such as if she'll ever be able to have children, or if she'll have regular menstrual cycles. But, physically, she will heal. It's just those internal injuries we don't know about. We won't know until we get the tests back tomorrow. We have her on pain medication and she will probably wake up within the next hour. We're going to let the two of you stay with her tonight, nurses will periodically check her vitals and I will be back to check on her in the morning."

Walker thanked the doctor for his information and Walker and Alex went back to their child's room. It was now 2:00am and they were both exhausted. There were two chairs sitting in the far corner of the room. They went and moved them up beside the bed and sat down.

"What happened Alex?"

"I don't know Walker. We were on the way home from the store and I stopped at a stop sign and she said there were people trying to get in the car. I told her to get out of her seat and come to me. I tried dialing you on my cell. They got in before I could do anything. Everything they did, they threatened Angela's life. When we stopped at that diner, they told me not to try anything or they'd kill her. When we came back out they'd ditched my car in the woods and gotten a van. They took us to the room. They said they were gonna have their fun with both of us. I laid over her until…" Alex began to cry as she continued. "…until they were able to move my arm. They put the gun to her head and told me they'd kill her if I didn't get off. They made me sit there and watch. They did her in ways that no girl should ever be done. It's all my fault. I couldn't even protect my own daughter. What kind of mothe..." She was cut off by Walker. "That's not true Alex. You did what you could. You tried. She will still love you and I still love you." Alex had her head in her hands sobbing. Walker picked her up out of her chair and sat her in his lap. He held her as she cried. His words did nothing to ease her pain. Alex felt horrible. She felt as if she was the worst person in the world that she couldn't even protect her daughter from such violence. She felt like Angela would hate her forever. All she could do was cry.

Around 2:45am Angela woke up. When she awoke the first thing she saw was her Mommy sitting in her Daddy's lap sleeping. Walker looked at his daughter and smiled. He stood up with Alex and walked to the other side of the room and laid her on the other bed that was provided for them. He knew she needed sleep more than anything right now. He covered her under the sheets and kissed her forehead. He walked back over to Angela and looked at her. He took her little hand in both of his bigger ones.

"Hey baby girl. How are you feeling?"

"It still hurts. But not like it did. Daddy I don't wanna be here. I wanna go home."

Walker chuckled. She was definitely a Walker, taking on both her Father and her Mother's genes when it came to staying in hospitals. "When they get you better, Mommy and I will take you home. Until then, we'll both stay right here with you. We won't go anywhere sunshine."

"Okay Daddy. Daddy I'm scared. Why did those bad men hurt me? What did I do to them? Are they going to hurt me again?" Walker got teary eyed at the realization of what she was referring to. "You don't have to be scared Angel. They hurt you because they're just bad men. You didn't do anything to them and I promise you they will never hurt you again."

"Okay. Daddy, why hasn't Mommy talked to me? She hasn't talked to me since before the bad guys hurt me. Is she mad at me? I didn't mean to let them hurt me. Does she not love me anymore? Daddy, please tell her I'm sorry. I don't want her to not love me."

Walker was listening so intently to Angela that he didn't notice Alex stirring in her sleep and awakening. Neither of them knew Alex was awake until they heard her lying on the bed crying. Walker walked over to Alex and grabbed her hand, helping her out of the bed, and walked with her back to Angela.

Angela saw her mom come beside her and she burst into tears. "Mommy I'm so sorry. Please still love me. I'm so sorr…" Alex cut her off, crying right along with her. Alex grabbed Angela's hand and began: "You don't have anything to be sorry for baby. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry I haven't talked to you. Angela, I don't want you to _ever_ think that I don't love you. You are my baby girl. You and you're daddy are my two reasons for getting up everyday and I love both of you more than either of you will ever know." Alex said through her tears. "The two of you are my world. I'm sorry I let this happen to you. I really am."

"But Mommy, you tried to help me. Remember, you laid over me for a long time."

Alex wiped her tears. "Yes baby, I remember."

"Mommy I'm tired. I wanna go to sleep. Will you lay here with me? I don't wanna go to sleep alone."

"You're not alone baby girl. Your daddy and I are right here, but you don't even have to ask me that. You know I will."

Angela scooted over and Alex laid down on her right side next to Angela and put her right arm above Angela's head, resting it around the right side of Angela, and put her left arm across Angela's stomach. Angela, in turn put her right arm over her mother's left arm, holding her mom as close to her as she could, feeling safe with her mom next to her. Alex kissed Angela on the forehead. Angela closed her eyes and slept. Walker moved a chair to the other side of the bed so that he could see both of them. He leaned over and kissed Angela on the forehead and kissed Alex on the lips. Alex lay there wide eyed staring at Walker. He picked up her right hand with his left and held it. Her eyes began to water with tears. He squeezed her hand and reached over to wipe her tears with his free hand.

At 4:00am, Walker and Alex both had done nothing but spend the last hour staring at each other and their child. Exhausted, Walker draped his right arm across both of his girls, with it resting over the small of Alex's back. He laid his head over his left arm and was asleep. Alex looked at him again. She felt so horrible about everything that had happened, but she was so thankful that she had a loving husband to help her get through it all. She put her right hand over his head and stroked his hair while he slept. Before she knew it, she too, had fallen asleep; her right hand resting over Walker's head.


	4. CUATR0

That is the way the nurse found them when she came to check on Angela at 6:30am. She stopped and stared for a moment, in awe at the family laying before her. She thought how loving those two parents must be and how lucky that little girl was to have them. As she began to walk toward the bed, Walker awoke. He looked at the nurse, who smiled kindly at him.

She spoke softly, "I'm just here to check her vitals; I'll be gone before you ever knew I came."

"Okay, let me move my wife…"

"That won't be necessary sir. Your wife isn't in the way of anything I need to do. That little girl looks a lot more peaceful with your wife laying there than she did last night lying there alone." Walker smiled at her comment. It made him think of how close Alex and Angela have always been. Of course, they're both 'his girls', but almost losing both of them when Alex had Angela has always been their common bond. He always told them how he was the luckiest man in the world because God let him go home with both of them that day, when he wasn't supposed to go home with either of them. It made him think of last night again. He didn't know if he'd get to bring either of them home again, but now he was going to get to take his girls home.

The nurse checked everything and told Walker that Angela looked okay and that Dr. Rogers would be there at 9:00am to see Angela. Walker thanked her and she left. Walker sat back down in the chair and picked up Alex's right hand with both of his hands. He sat there holding her hand, staring at the two of them sleeping peacefully, glad that they'd both lived through the night before. At 8:15am food was brought to the room for the three of them. Walker woke Alex and Angela up. Alex climbed out of the bed while Walker helped Angela sit up to eat the food on her tray. Walker sat on the edge of the bed and ate his food off the tray. Alex, on the other hand, had gone to the window and sat in the window sill staring out of it.

"Alex, aren't you gonna eat anything?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Alex, you need to eat."

"I'm not hungry!"

"Alex…"

"WALKER, I said I'm not hungry!"

Walker looked to Angela. "Keep eating, I'm gonna go see what's wrong with Mommy." She nodded her head, and continued with her breakfast. She couldn't understand why her Mommy wasn't hungry. She sure was.

Walker walked over to the far side of the room where Alex was sitting. "Why won't you eat Alex? I know it's more than what you're telling me. You haven't eaten since lunch yesterday. Talk to me Alex."

"I just can't eat Walker. I'm not hungry."

"Okay Alex, but if you decide to tell me what's really wrong with you, you know I'll listen. In the mean time, I'm going downstairs to get coffee. Do you want some?"

"No."

"Okay. And Alex…"

"Yea?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

With that, he turned and walked out of the room. Alex turned to see Angela, who had finished her food, staring at her. Alex put on a fake smile for her daughter and walked to her. She moved the tray away from the bed and sat.

"Do you feel better with food in your stomach?"

"Yes I do. Mommy, I hurt where I go to the bathroom. Why does it hurt Mommy?"

That was Alex's undoing and her constant reminder of what, she felt like, was something that was all her fault and something she could have prevented. "Because they hurt you down there baby. We'll get you some medicine when the doctor comes in a few minutes and you'll feel better."

It wasn't quite 9:00 and Walker came in the room, coffee in hand. He had no more than sat down next to the bed, than Dr. Rogers came in. He checked Angela over, telling her parents that, physically, she was progressing nicely and the bruises should be gone within a few days. He then looked through the files in the folder he held in his hand.

"Mr. and Mrs. Walker, could I speak with the two of you outside?"

They followed him outside into the hallway, where no one else was around. "I have some bad news. Tests on Angela have indicated that her uterus has been damaged. She will never have a menstrual cycle or children. However, it doesn't have to be removed from her body. It is the equivalent of the appendix, there and in the body, but of no use. Whether to leave her uterus in her or have it removed is a family decision. It will be of no harm to her if you decide to leave it there. She will be able to grow up and have intercourse if she chooses, but she will never have a menstrual cycle or be able to conceive children. I'm very sorry to tell you this. As far as anything else goes, she's fine. I'm going to let her be discharged this afternoon as long as you keep a close eye on her. I will prescribe her some medicine for the pain. If she starts to bleed or complain of any pain that you don't think she should be having, don't think twice to bring her back." Walker wiped the tear that had fallen down his cheek, thanked the doctor, and together he and Alex walked back in the room to Angela.

"What did the doctor say?" Angela asked as her mom walked past her to sit on the bed on the other side of the room and her dad walked to her.

"We'll tell you later honey. How are you feeling?" Walker replied.

"I feel fine Daddy. I wanna go home. When can we go home?"

"We'll all go home this afternoon, okay. In the mean time, why don't you watch some cartoons on the TV?"

"Alright." Angela grabbed the remote to the television and turned on her favorite cartoons. Before Walker made it to Alex, Angela had dosed off.

Walker walked over to Alex. He had a feeling that she was blaming herself again and he knew that, right now, Alex was going to need more help getting through this than Angela would. Alex was sitting on the bed facing away from Walker and Angela. She had her head in her hands and he could hear her crying. He sat on the bed next to her.

"Honey, are you okay?"

Alex didn't answer him. Instead she just looked up at him with her tearstained face. He could see through her eyes into her soul. He knew she had never felt this bad about anything else in her life.

"Alex, this isn't your fault."

"Walker, I don't wanna hear that. It is my fault. It's _all_ my fault. Stop telling me that mess. It's my fault and you know it, why don't I just pack all my things and leave. I'll go far away. The two of you can live happily ever after and the cause of all her pain will be gone." Alex was crying so hard and talking so fast that she started breathing in hard, long gasps. She was having a panic attack and couldn't breathe. She was so upset that she didn't care to fight it.

Walker reacted instantly. "Alex! Calm down. Breathe honey."


	5. CiNC0

Alex didn't listen to anything he said. She felt like she didn't deserve to breathe after what she made her daughter go through. Walker quickly noticed she wasn't hearing him. He grabbed her face between his hands, forcing her to stare at him.

"Alexandra Walker! Don't you do this to me! Don't you do this to your daughter! Calm down. Breathe." As her breathing slowly began to return to normal, he continued holding her head cupped in his hands, staring directly into her eyes, talking to her. "I love you Alex. Just breathe. Everything will be okay. Take it slow. There you go." Once her breathing returned completely to normal, he quickly let go of her head and pulled her to him, holding her as tight as he could.

"Alex, it is _not_ your fault. What makes you think you need to leave? I don't want you to go anywhere. I need you right here with me. We would never live 'happily ever after' without you Alex."

Alex didn't respond. She just sat there oblivious to everything around her. Walker held her in his arms and rocked her side to side trying to keep her calm. He had his left hand rubbing circles on her back and his right hand held her head to him. She soon fell asleep in his arms. He slowly stood and gently placed her legs on the bed. He drew the covers over her and went to lay her down. He gently placed her head on the pillow. The minute he went to pull the covers up her the rest of the way, she opened her eyes.

"Don't leave me. Just lay here and hold me. Please." Alex said as one lone tear slid down her cheek. Walker was more than happy to oblige to her wishes. He lifted the covers, she scooted over and he laid beside her. He drew out his right arm, motioning for her to come to him. She turned over and tucked her head into his shoulder and he laid his right arm around her. She let her right arm go across his chest. She lay with her head close to his, staring at him. He looked back at her and took his left hand and began tucking her hair behind her ear so he could see her face. "Alex, you are the most beautiful woman in the world to me. You are my lover, my wife, and my _best_ friend. You mean the world to me. I love you more than any words could express. I don't want you to _ever_ leave. I can't imagine one day without you. You're a strong woman and we _will_ make it through this. I promise." Again, Alex said nothing. She stared at him and slowly nodded her head. He kissed her forehead and let his left arm rest across her right one that was lying across his stomach. Before long, all three Walkers in the room were sleeping, deprived of much sleep the night before.

Around noon, a nurse came in to check Angela's vitals again and to bring her food. Walker had slipped from Alex's arms about 15 minutes earlier as he heard Angela stirring in her sleep. He was sitting on the edge of her bed coloring with her. Once the nurse left, Angela began to eat her food.

"Daddy, you can have my green beans."

"That's okay honey; I'm not really hungry after our big breakfast this morning."

"Oh c'mon daddy, I don't like them and Mommy's still sleeping. Didn't y'all always teach me not to waste food?"

Walker chuckled. Angela was right. They had always taught her not to put food her plate that she didn't like or wouldn't eat because there was no need in wasting food. Walker also knew Angela didn't have any taste for green beans.

"Okay. I'll eat them."

Angela handed Walker her fork and he quickly ate the green beans. He gave her the fork back and she continued eating the food on her tray. Suddenly, out of nowhere, they heard a noise. Walker turned to see Alex on the bed behind them, violently shaking. He stared at her for a moment to see why she was doing it. She began to talk in her sleep.

"No! Take me. No, you're hurting her. Stop! Get off of her. Please stop. Take me instead. Walker, help her." She was now screaming, crying, and shaking violently on the bed. Walker ran to her, sat on the edge of the bed and grabbed her right hand tightly.

"Alex! Wake up. You're dreaming. You're just dreaming. Get up." He kept on talking to her, but it was like she was in a world that he couldn't get to her in. Her shaking was getting worse by the second and he didn't know what to do. He finally picked her up off the bed and stood up. He stood there holding her like a small child, much like the two of them hold Angela when she's upset. He walked in small circles between the two beds, trying to wake her up.

Angela, seeing all of this unfold, was scared. She didn't have any clue what was wrong with her mom, or what her mom kept yelling about. She didn't like seeing her Mommy crying and upset the way she was seeing her. She finally decided to say something about it. "Mommy!"

As if Angela's voice was the magic code, Alex awoke. She realized Walker was holding her, and she clung to him for dear life. He sat down on the other bed with her in his lap. She was crying uncontrollably and sweating profusely.

"Walker, they got her again. They got her Walker." She said in between sobs. "She didn't make it Walker. They kil…" Walker put his finger over her lips and pulled her closer to him. "Shh honey. You were just dreaming. She's right here. She's fine. Look at her. She's okay." Alex turned around and saw a very scared Angela looking at her. Alex immediately got out of Walker's lap and went to Angela as fast as she could. She grabbed Angela's hand and sat in the chair next to her.

"Mommy, what was wrong with you? Why were you so upset?"

"It's nothing honey, I just had a really bad dream and it scared me really, really bad."

"I'll say. I thought you were _never_ gonna quit screaming."

Alex smiled through the tears that had begun to slow their way down her cheeks. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just worry about you so much, that's all."

"Well you don't have to. Daddy's right here, he's not gonna let anything happen to us. Right, Daddy?"

Walker walked up to the chair Alex was sitting in. He got her out of the chair, and sat down, pulling her down in his lap. He wrapped his arms securely around her waist. He looked to Angela. "Right baby girl." He then looked directly into Alex's eyes. "Right baby girl." He repeated himself directly to her to make sure she understood. She laid her arms across his, and settled into his comforting embrace.

It was now 1:00 in the afternoon, Walker and Angela had been talking about riding horses once she was able to again. Alex had gone back to not talking to anyone. He had noticed how she wouldn't converse with anyone unless she absolutely had to. She was only talking to Angela, and only when Angela spoke to her. She wasn't acting like herself. She's known for always telling him what's on her mind. He noticed she wouldn't talk to him at all. She seemed very withdrawn and he didn't like it one bit. It told him something was definitely wrong and he was going to have a difficult time getting to the bottom of it.


	6. SEiS

By 2:30 Angela was being discharged. The nurse wheeled her downstairs, while her parents walked hand-in-hand beside them. Once they were outside, they all got into Walker's truck, which Trivette dropped off earlier in the day while they all were sleeping.

As they rode home, Angela fell asleep in the back seat. She was given medicine that would make her sleep a lot so she could heal faster. Walker decided to try to have a conversation with Alex… about anything. He decided to try and make it simple.

"What do you want for supper tonight Alex? I'll make whatever you want."

"I'm not hungry Walker. I don't want anything."

"Alex, you haven't eaten since noon yesterday, that's been over 24 hours. You're gonna get sick if you don't eat something."

"Walker, I'm a grown woman. I can tell time. I know how long it's been. That doesn't change the fact that I'm not hungry."

"You _have_ to eat Alex. I don't care how upset you are, I don't want you getting sick because you won't eat."

"You can't tell me what to do Walker. I don't have to eat supper if I don't want to. Why can't you just leave me alone about it? I'll eat when I'm darn good and ready."

"Why are you doing this Alex?" Walker tried to see if she would open up to him.

"Doing what? I'm not hungry and that's that. There's nothing more to it."

Walker decided to try the rough approach. "Alex if I have to hold you down and stuff something down your throat, mark my words, you _will_ eat before this day is over with."

"You _try_ that Cordell Walker. Do it. Just _try_ it. I _dare_ you." She accented her words to let him know she was holding her ground.

"Why? What will you do to stop me Alex?"

"Oh great Walker, now you're gonna beat me up to make me eat. Well thanks. I'm glad to know you hate me that much. But I guess it's okay, I deserve it. Why don't you just let me off right here on the curb and run over me. It couldn't feel any worse than knowing how much you hate me right now." Alex said as she began to cry again.

Hearing her words tore at his heart so bad that he immediately pulled over to the shoulder on the right side of the road. He looked in her direction. He couldn't see her face, for she had turned her head facing out her window. She had uncontrolled tears rolling down her cheeks. Alex Walker seriously thought her husband hated her. She really felt like he just wanted to knock her out like he's done so many criminals over the years. She honestly had no clue how she could live with herself after all of this.

"Alex, look at me." Walker said as gently as he could. She didn't turn her head. "Alex." She turned her head and no sooner did she turn than did she start talking. "Do it Walker. I know you hate me. Just go ahead and hit me now. Put me out of my misery. Get it over with. Please."

He just stared at her. He couldn't believe what was coming out of her mouth. Tears began to pool in his eyes. He tried to speak; no words would come to him. He was at a loss of words. He kept replaying everything she said, over and over in his head. He couldn't think of anything to say or do. He finally laid both his arms across the steering wheel, put his head down on his arms, and cried.

Alex looked at him, and looked out her window, it was pouring rain. The dreariness of the day seemed to match her current attitude. When she saw Walker lay his head down, she took her opportunity. She opened the door of the truck, and ran. She ran into the fields alongside the road. She didn't know where she was going, but she knew she was running. She ran like wild through the rain. She didn't feel like Walker would care to get her. She really wished he'd just drive on, without her.

Walker immediately noticed her quick exit and he took off like a mustang after her. She didn't make it 100 feet from the truck and he caught her. He grabbed her waist from behind her. She tried to fight him off until she realized there was no way she could win. "Alex, stop it. Stop thinking like this." He begged through his tears. "Talk to me Alex. Please talk to me."

"Walker, I know you hate me for what I let happen and now she can never have kids and it's all my fault. How can you still like me after that, much less love me? Just let me go. Please let me go." She cried.

He stood in front of her and took each of her hands in each of his. He looked directly into her blue eyes. "Alex, you didn't _let_ anything happen. I could never stop loving you. I will _never_ stop loving you. I can't believe you said all those things that you said back there. What on earth would make you think I would ever hit you, or run over you? That broke my heart in half just hearing you say that Alex. That hurt, it really did. I never thought I would hear such things come from your mouth. I've told you this before and I will keep repeating myself until you get it. You're my best friend. You're my lover. You, Alexandra Cahill-Walker, are my wife. You are the most important person in this world to me. I cannot imagine one day waking up without you by my side, there to brighten my day. Our love created that sleeping child in the truck and our love will get us through this. You have to have faith and believe. We will make it. I love you. Please understand that."

He grabbed her and held onto her tightly. He held her like he was scared to let go. Slowly, she wrapped her arms around him and cried onto his shoulder. He cried onto hers as well. They stood there, in the rain, holding onto each other for several minutes before finally Walker picked her up and carried her back to the truck. He sat her down in the passenger seat, closed her door, and quickly hurried around to his side. He got in, buckled up, and started the engine. He looked at Alex. The look on her face didn't look any better than it did before she ran out of the truck. He knew they still had a long way to go, but at least now, he could get her to go home with him. He gently stuck out his right hand, and grabbed her left. He intertwined their fingers and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. He put the truck in drive, and they rode the rest of the way home like that.

Once they arrived home, Walker told Alex to go inside, get out of her wet clothes, and take a nice warm bath. He didn't want her physically sick on top of the emotional turmoil she was going through. She slowly got out of the truck and walked inside. Walker reached behind him, and pulled out Angela. He wrapped a blanket from the truck around her so that he wouldn't get her wet from his clothing. He carried her inside and took her upstairs to her room, laid her on her bed and gently pulled her blanket over her. He kissed her forehead and walked out of the room.

Walker walked into his and Alex's room. He changed out of his wet clothes. He walked into the bathroom to put his clothes in there to dry. He saw Alex's clean clothes lying on the counter by the sink. He looked towards the tub and saw Alex in it fast asleep. He thought how beautiful and peaceful her face looked in her sleep. He sat on the floor beside her, mesmerized by her beauty. He decided to just talk to her; he didn't care that she was sleeping and couldn't hear him. He just wanted to talk to her. "Alex, I know you're hurting so much over all of this. I understand how you feel. She's my little girl too and I'd probably feel the same way you do if I wasn't able to protect her. You tried though; she knows how much you love her just by you laying over her like you did. She knows you'd give your life for her any day if you had to. I know it to. I hate how you're hurting and I hate how you feel. If I could take the pain from you I would. I can't believe you seriously thought I hated you though. You are the love of my life. You're my everything and I could have sat there and died when you said that. I just want you to understand, know, and believe that Angela and I both love you to death. We're all going to get through this, just like we always do, just like we always will." He went to brush his hand across her forehead and she awoke.

"Ugh, how long have I been in here? I'm gonna wrinkle up into a prune. Hand me a towel please." Walker handed her a towel and walked out of the bathroom to go check on Angela. By the time he walked back in their room, Alex was in there combing her hair and throwing it up into a ponytail.

"How's Angela?" she asked.

"She is peacefully sleeping in her room."

"Good."

"Yea. Alex it's 5:00. Will you please eat something?"

"Walker, I'm not hungry. I will eat when I get hungry."

He didn't feel like fighting with her again, but he didn't want her getting sick. "Fine, will you at least drink a glass of milk. For me. Please."

"Fine Walker." Together they walked downstairs. She sat at the kitchen table while he fixed her a glass of milk. He handed it to her and sat beside her. She'd taken about two sips when they heard screaming.


	7. SiETE

"Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Help me!"

Before the first 'Mommy!' got out of her mouth they were both running. When they made it to her room, she was crying and shaking. She kept screaming for her Mommy. They made it to her bedside; Alex sat down, grabbed Angela and put her arms around her.

"Shh baby girl, it's okay. We're right here. You were just dreaming. It's all okay."

"Mommy they got me. They kept doing it to me. They wouldn't quit Mommy. They tied you up and Daddy couldn't find us. Mommy I'm scared."

Alex sat there, tears rolling down her face. Walker sat on the other side of the bed and put his arms around both of them. "It's okay Angela. Mommy and I are right here. We're not gonna let anything happen to you. We've got you. No one's going to touch you. No one's going to hurt you. You don't have anything to be afraid of." Her crying soon slowed and finally stopped. She sat there, still trembling, in the arms of her parents.

"Can I sleep with y'all tonight? I don't wanna sleep by myself."

"You have nothing to be scared of Angela, but of course you can sleep with us, Right honey?" Walker said.

"Right. You can sleep with us as long as you want to baby girl."

"I'm hungry. What's for dinner?" Angela asked.

"What do you want? I'll make anything you want." Walker replied.

"I want chicken with mashed potatoes and gravy."

"Alright. You sit here with Mommy and I'll go cook you dinner."

Angela got up off the bed and went to her table in her room to color. "Mommy come color with me." Alex got off the bed and joined Angela at her table. They each picked up a coloring book and began to color away. Angela colored in a Winnie, The Pooh book while Alex colored in a Rugrats book. They'd colored for 45 minutes until Walker called upstairs saying Angela's food was ready. Walker and Angela ate, washed the dishes, and gotten the kitchen clean in an hour. It was now 7:00 and Alex was sitting on the living room couch reading, where she'd been since she brought Angela downstairs for dinner. Walker and Angela joined her in the living room. She put down her book and looked at them. They looked back at her. She could tell they were up to something, but wasn't sure what it was.

Before she knew it, four hands were all over her, tickling her to death. She busted out in laughter, something Walker could have never been happier to see. She tried to retaliate but between not being able to over power Walker and not wanting to accidentally tickle Angela in one of her bruised places, she couldn't do much. They all three finally ended up on the floor rolling in laughter.

Walker couldn't have been happier at that moment. If even just for a few minutes, things in their family were normal and they were all laughing and enjoying themselves. Walker finally sat on the floor, leaning up against the couch. He pulled Alex to him. She sat 'Indian style' in between his legs with her back against his chest. He encircled her waist in his arms. They stared for a moment at Angela, who still lay on the floor giggling. Finally she looked up and laughingly asked them what they were looking at. She then went running to them. She put her arms around Alex's neck and squeezed with everything she had. Alex then put her arms around Angela and hugged her back. They were all giggling at the sudden impact Angela gave when she ran into them. Angela then turned around and sat in her mother's lap. Alex encircled Angela's waist with her arms. They all just sat there for the longest. Walker enjoyed just sitting there, knowing that both of his girls were safe in his arms. He made it his lifelong commitment to himself to keep them safe. He treasured them more than any riches or gold in the world.

By 8:30, both of the girls had fallen asleep sitting on the floor with Walker. He eased his way from around Alex and leaned her against the couch. He gently unwound Angela from Alex's arms. Alex was instantly awakened by Angela being taken from her.

"Shh honey. It's okay, I've got her. I'm gonna take her to our bed. I'll be back to get you. Go back to sleep."

Alex was still half asleep and the minute she realized it was Walker who had Angela, she fell back asleep. Walker carried Angela upstairs, changed her into pajamas and tucked her into the middle of his and Alex's bed. He then went back downstairs. He found Alex, who'd woken up again, laid on the couch, and fallen back asleep. He stared at her for a moment. He thought how no matter what she was wearing or what she was doing that she was just the most beautiful woman in the world. He gently picked her up and carried her upstairs. He laid her on her side of the bed. She instantly rolled over and laid her right arm around Angela. Walker got in on his side. He looked at both of them. He kissed Angela on the forehead, then Alex. He wrapped his left arm around them both. Before long, he too, was asleep.

Around 1:30am Walker was awakened by noise. He looked to see Alex twisting around on her side of the bed. She began talking in a distraught voice and Walker listened intently.

"Please take me. Do what you want with me, but leave her alone."…"Yes, you can have your way with me, but you have to leave her alone. Please." She began stifling her moans in pain and Walker knew what she was dreaming. "Owww!" Her sudden scream caused an instant reaction from Walker. He quickly went to move a sleeping Angela to the other side of him so that he could get to Alex. She continued to moan and cry and Walker felt as if he couldn't get to her fast enough. He gently laid Angela down on his left side and quickly went to Alex.

He sat up and grabbed her shoulders to sit her up. Once he had her in a sitting position and was steadying her, he gently shook her.

"Alex, Alex. Wake up." She didn't. She continued yelling for them to stop, that they were hurting her. He couldn't listen to what she was saying. He couldn't imagine what she was going through in her dream and he hated what she was dreaming about. Tears began to fall down his face at the mere thought of her going through what she was dreaming. He picked her up and sat her in his lap. He held her face in his hands to keep her head still. Again he said "Alex, wake up. You're dreaming honey. Please wake up for me." She finally did. She looked directly into his teary eyes and knew that she had, again, talked her end of her dream out loud while she slept. She began to cry knowing that he knew what she dreamt.

He held her close and rocked her. "Walker, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do it, but they were gonna hurt Angela. I would never betray you." This added to her guilt. She now felt like he couldn't trust her because he knew she had let them do what they did to start with. Even though it was just a dream, it didn't matter to her, she felt like he would think she'd go out and do things like that in their everyday life. Walker knew at that instant that this nightmare would only add to their traumas. "Alex, I know honey. I know you wouldn't ever betray me. You were only dreaming Alex, I know that. Even if it had happened that way, I know that you would have done it for Angela. It's the last thing I would want, but I understand the circumstances. Alex, please look at me." He pulled her from him, and looked at her. "Alex?" She stared him in the eyes. With tears running down both their faces he said "I know you wouldn't ever do that to me. I trust you Alex. I know you. You wouldn't do that to me. You wouldn't do that to us. Please know that I know this. Please believe me when I say I wouldn't hold that against you. I love you Alex."

She didn't say anything. She just slowly nodded and returned her head to his shoulder. She didn't want anything more at that moment than to be held. She now felt like both Angela and Walker were going to hold grudges against her for the rest of her life. She didn't know what to do or even what to think.

Walker slowly laid her back down with him and held her. He held her tucked into his right side. She had her right hand resting across his chest and her head propped up on his right shoulder. He had his right hand across her upper back holding her close to him, with his left arm stretched out holding her body to him.

She steadily cried and it was very clear to him that she wasn't going to talk about it. So he settled for just holding her close. After laying there for an hour just holding her, her crying had slowed and eventually stopped, but she sat there wide eyed, just staring into the distance. Finally Walker spoke.

"Alex?"

"Hmm?" She said as she looked towards him.

"I _do_ love you. You know that right?"

"Yes Walker. I love you too. I really do. I just can't… I just can't seem to talk about things. But I do love you more than you'll ever know."

He smiled. "That's all I needed to hear. We'll be okay Alex. We will."

She nodded her head and tightened her grasp on him.


	8. OCH0

Neither of them ever fell back asleep that night. They just laid there wrapped in each other's embrace until 7:00am when Angela began to stir. They both looked towards her and she slowly opened her eyes. She looked and saw her Daddy lying on her right side, she cuddled up to him. He chuckled and put his arm around her. She was just like her mother, not much of a morning person.

Did you sleep well? Walker asked her.

"I guess. I had a bad dream, but it didn't wake me up."

"Wanna tell us about it?"

"Not really."

Okay, if you change your mind, let us know okay."

"Okay daddy."

"Are you hungry?"

"Yea, I want eggs and bacon and a biscuit with that white gravy stuff on it. You know, like mommy makes it."

Walker chuckled. "Well Alex, seems like she has her menu planned all out. Would you like some too?"

"No, I'm not hungry."

Walker unwound himself from both of them and looked towards Angela. "Angela, will you please go to your room for a minute. I need to talk to mommy."

"Are you guys fighting again?"

"Angela." Walker said in a tone that she knew meant business.

"Okay, I'm going."

She got up and left the room, closing the door behind her.

"Alex, you _have_ to eat."

"Walker, why are you doing this to me?"

"Doing what Alex? Being concerned for your health or being concerned for you? I don't know, maybe because I care about you and I don't want you getting sick."

She looked at him, rolled her eyes and went to rise from the bed. He grabbed her left arm as she did so. "Walker let go of me." "No." "Let go!" "NO! Alex you are _going_ to eat. You don't get an opinion in the matter anymore; I don't care if you say you're not hungry. You're going to eat something. It's not up for discussion." She sat down on the bed and crawled under the covers. "What are you doing Alex?" "Going to sleep, if I sleep, you can't make me eat when I don't want to." Walker's anger was beginning to rise and he was getting really frustrated with her. "Alex, you will either go with me downstairs and eat some food or I will put you in that truck outside, drive you to the hospital and have you admitted for an eating disorder." "Good because I know you don't want me here." "ALEX!" He got really angry, got up and left the room. He didn't want to say anything he'd regret. Alex looked towards the door he had just slammed shut, pulled the covers further over her head and cried.

Walker went to Angela's room and found her in there playing with her Barbie dolls. "Wanna come help me with breakfast Angel?" She looked up at him with her childlike innocence and giggled a "yes" in response. She ran to him and he picked her up to carry her downstairs.

Walker and Angela were sitting at the table finishing up their breakfast when Walker got an idea. "Angel, I'm gonna make Mommy some toast. I'm gonna put it on a plate and I want you to take it to her. I want you to sit there and watch her eat it. Make sure she eats it. Can you do that for me?" "Okay Daddy, but why?" "Well Angel, I think she'll eat if you tell her to." "Okay."

In no time he had the toast made and on a plate. "Here, go take it to Mommy for me, and remember; make sure she eats it." "Okay."

Angela walked up the stairs to her parents' room and knocked on the door, then slowly entered. Alex was sitting in there reading a magazine. She looked up at Angela. "Here Mommy, I brought you some toast." "Well thank you baby, but I'm not hungry." Angela handed her mom the plate and hopped over her to sit beside her on the bed. "No Mommy. You're eating it. I heard you and Daddy in here, Mommy I need you here, not in a hospital. I love you too and I want you home with me. So, you got to eat something so Daddy won't take you to the hospital. Mommy please eat, for me." A tear slide down Alex's cheek and she smiled. "Okay baby girl, for you." Alex picked up a piece of toast, and began to eat it. Angela crawled under the covers and snuggled up to her.

Alex finally finished the second piece of toast and put the plate down. She looked down at Angela who was smiling up at her. Alex scooted down in the covers with Angela. She laid her head on the pillow and turned on her left side to look at Angela, who was lying on her right side. "Thank you Angel. It was good." Angela giggled. "Daddy made it." "And did your father send you up here?" "Well, yes he did, but Mommy I really don't want you to go to the hospital. I really do want you here and I really do love you too." Alex smiled. "I know sweetie, I know. What do you say, wanna go back to sleep with me?" "Well, I'm scared to sleep. I don't like sleeping Mommy. It's when all the nightmares come." "I know, I get them too, but it's all gonna be okay. You want me to hold you in the rocking chair and I promise I won't let anything get you. I'll hold you tight." Angela nodded her head.

They got up and walked to the rocking chair in the corner of the bedroom. Alex took the blanket from off the back of the chair and sat down. Angela climbed up in her lap. They were sitting face to face and Angela's legs hung through the open arms of the rocking chair. Angela laid her head on her mother's chest. Alex wrapped the blanket securely around them. She wrapped her left arm around Angela's back, and her right arm was holding Angela's head to her. She began rocking them. An "I love you, Angel." and an "I love you too, Mommy." escaped both their lips and before long, they both fell asleep in the rocking chair.

Walker had finished cleaning the kitchen and gone upstairs to check on them. He found them asleep in the rocking chair. He smiled at the sight of them and the look of peace on their faces. He kissed both of them on the head, then covered them with an additional blanket and went to the task of taking care of the horses.

Around 11:00am Alex awoke. She saw that Angela was still sleeping in her lap. She looked up to see Walker sitting in another chair in the room reading a book. He looked towards her. She spoke softly to him. "Walker, please come get her off of me, I need to use the bathroom." He got up, walked over to them and picked up Angela. Alex rushed to the restroom. Walker went and laid Angela on his and Alex's bed.

By the time Alex arrived back in the room, Walker had Angela covered back up and snuggled into their bed. As she continued to walk in the room, Walker looked towards her and walked to her. He grabbed her hand and led her downstairs to the living room. They sat on the couch and he began talking.

"Alex, I'm really sorry for getting upset with you earlier. I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm just really worried about you honey. I hate seeing you this way. I just want to help you."

"It's okay, and I know Walker, I know you just want to help. But I don't think you can. I don't think anyone can. I don't think there's anything that will ever make me forget what I saw that night. There's just… there's just nothing in this world that can compare to the feeling I got when I saw them do that to my baby. I watched them do this Walker, I saw it. I watched as they both stuck their fully erect penis in her, and…" She had to stop and gather herself for a moment. "… and to sit there and watch her scream and cry; she begged for me to help her. I couldn't do anything or they'd kill her. Walker there's nothing that can compare to that feeling, to know your child needs you the most and there isn't anything you can do about it. Not _one_ damn thing."

When she finished talking, both of them had tears in their eyes. Walker grabbed Alex and held her. He hated what she had just described to him, but he was glad that she'd finally let him in on the way she was feeling. The two of them laid there on the couch in each other's arms for what seemed like forever until their five-year-old daughter walked into the living room.

Angela walked up to them and climbed on top of her parents. Walker put his left arm around her and Alex put her right arm around her. They both realized how lucky they were to still _have_ that little girl that jumps on them when she feels like it.

"How was your nap Angel?" Walker asked her.

"Good, but I was scared when I woke up and Mommy wasn't there anymore. I thought the bad guys took her, then I remembered I was in your room and y'all probably were down here."

Alex tightened her grasp on Angela. "Honey, there _are_ no bad guys that will get me, or you. Those bad guys will never mess with us again. I'm sorry I left you up there alone, but Daddy and I didn't want to wake you while you were sleeping, so we came down here."

"It's okay Mommy."


	9. NUEVE

They all laid there for a few moments when something outside the window caught Angela's eye. "Mommy! Daddy! Look, it's snowing!" Angela instantly got up and went running for the window. Walker and Alex weren't far behind. As they stood there looking out the window, Walker picked up Angela and held her with his right arm, then slipped his left arm around Alex. Angela laid her head on Walker's right shoulder while Alex slipped her right arm Walker's back and rested her head on his left shoulder.

"It's beautiful." Alex said.

"It sure is honey, it sure is.", replied Walker.

The family stood there for a few more moments before Angela made the announcement that she was hungry.

"What's for lunch, Daddy?"

"Hmm, how about Hamburger Helper?"

"Yummy! That sounds really good!"

"I'll tell you what; you and Mommy sit in here and watch TV while I make lunch."

"Sounds good to me, What about you Mommy?"

"Okay", replied Alex.

Walker went to make their lunch while Alex and Angela settled down on the couch to watch TV. Walker finished the food and left it on the stove to simmer. He went to sit with his girls on the couch. Alex had nestled herself into the right corner of the couch, with Angela snuggled into her left side. They didn't have on anything more than jeans and a t-shirt, so they had a blanket strung across them. As he sat in the middle of the couch, Angela stretched her legs out and laid them across her daddy's lap. She laid her head on her mother's left side, using it as a pillow. Alex put her left arm across Angela and readjusted the blanket as Angela got comfortable. Angela was laying on her right side, still watching TV.

As they sat there watching TV, a commercial came on with a little girl whose mother was putting a band aid on a small cut. It brought back a memory and sparked a thought in young Angela.

"Hey, that little girl's getting a band aid on her knee just like you put on my knee when I fell down last summer. Remember Mommy?"

"Yes I do sweetie."

"I'm gonna be just like you when I grow up Mommy. I'm gonna put band aids on my kids and give them a kiss like you gave me that day and tell them that it will all be okay like you always tell me." Angela said.

Walker instantly looked to Alex and noticed the fresh tears forming in her eyes. Walker looked in Alex's eyes and they both understood that they had to tell their daughter. They had to tell their right then and there. Walker reached for the remote and cut the TV off.

"Hey! Why'd you cut the TV off Daddy? I was watching that."

"Angel, there's something your mother and I need to tell you."

"What?"

Alex instantly removed her feet from under her and sat in a regular sitting position. Walker picked Angela up and sat her in his lap. Alex looked very uncomfortable and Walker was quick to notice it. He sat Angela on his left side and motioned with his right hand for Alex to scoot to him. She scooted to him. He grabbed her left hand and intertwined their fingers. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze to assure her it would all be okay. Angela was beginning to get really nervous. She didn't like the way her parents were acting. It was as if they had something really bad to tell her and she was sure they did.

Finally Walker spoke. "Angel, do you remember when you were in the hospital and the doctor pulled us out of the room and told us something?"

"Yes."

He continued, "Angel, he told us that you would never have children. The bad guys hurt you too bad. You'll never be able to have children of your own."

Angela instantly jumped out of Walker's lap. She looked directly towards Alex and began screaming. "This is all your fault Mommy! You let them hurt me. It's all your fault. I _hate_ you! I _never_ wanna talk to you again! I wish you weren't my Mommy. It's all your fault."

"Angela Walker! Go to your room right now!" Walker yelled.

Angela stomped up the stairs with tears rolling down her face and went to her room and slammed the door. Walker looked back at Alex. She had tears streaming down her face worse than he had ever seen in his life, even worse than any tears he'd seen her cry these last few days. What scared him the most was the fact that she was so upset that she didn't even respond to anything Angela said. He pulled Alex to him and held her.

"I'm going to go talk to Angela. I'll be right back. Stay here." He told her.

Alex didn't respond she just sat there. Walker ran upstairs to Angela's room. He was too upset with her to even knock. He walked right in her room and found her lying on her bed holding a stuffed animal, crying. His heart melted for her at that instant. He knew he couldn't be as harsh as he had intended on being because Angela was hurting too.

He sat on the bed and picked her up and sat her in his lap. "Angela. I can't believe the way you just talked to your mother down there. That was completely uncalled for. Your mother did not _let_ anything happen and you know it. That woman downstairs is down there crying her eyes out because of what you said. You, Angela Walker, have just hurt her more than anyone in her life _ever_ has. She loves you with all her heart and would do anything in this world for you and that's how you talk to her? I can't believe you."

"But Daddy, I can't ever have babies when I grow up. She could have stopped them from hurting me and I wouldn't be this way. It's not fair."

"Life isn't always fair Angela, but I promise you, if there was _anything_ in her power she could have done to stop them, she would have. She would have laid down and died for you. I know this is a hard lesson for you to learn at your age, but I need you to understand me. She didn't let them hurt you. She loves you more than you will ever know and for you to treat her that way is the last thing I would have ever expected from you. I'm very disappointed in you Angela. I want you to sit up here and think about what you've said to your mother and think about how she's feeling right now. I'm going back downstairs to calm her down. You've really hurt her Angela. Think about that. I'll be back in a little while to check on you."

He sat Angela back on her bed and walked out of room, shutting the door behind him. He went downstairs and didn't see Alex on the couch. He knew she didn't come upstairs because he would have seen her from where he was sitting in Angela's room. After calling her name several times and looking around everywhere, he began to get worried.

Suddenly, a thought in his mind clicked. He went to his desk and looked. The top over his desk closes and locks. That's where he keeps his gun at, locked up, so Angela can't get a hold of it. He noticed that the desk top was rolled up and the gun was missing. Fear and panic instantly overtook him. He quickly realized that he couldn't let this overtake him now because he had to hope and pray he could get to his wife in time. He looked out the front door and saw a path in the snow towards the barn. He ran out the front door, following the footsteps closely. He got to the barn, where the footsteps ended, and began calling out her name.

Meanwhile, in one of the horse's stalls, Alex sat huddled on the ground with her back leaning against the back of the barn and her legs drawn up to her. She was shivering violently and crying profusely. She didn't want Walker's help this time. She honestly wanted out. She had all the confirmation in the world she needed… her daughter hated her. That was enough in her mind. Her child had told her that she hated her and never wanted to speak to her again. Alex felt like she was giving Angela what she wanted, to never speak to a person that she hated again.

Alex heard Walker calling her name. She knew it was now or never. She knew if she waited, he'd find her and she'd have to face Angela again. She didn't feel like she could do that. As she shook from the cold, Alex pulled the trigger.


	10. DiES

Walker heard the gunshot. He cried out her name and ran towards where he heard the gunshot. He looked in the stall and saw a very still Alex. His heart immediately sank. Her knees were still drawn up to her. Her left hand was wrapped around her legs, keeping them held to her. Her head was lying down, nestled in between her knees. Her right arm was lying on the ground, the gun still in her fingers. He ran to her. He picked up the gun and threw it out of the stall. He didn't see blood anywhere. He looked at her again. She lifted her head and he saw more pain in her eyes than he had ever seen in his life. He sank to his knees on her right side and pulled her to him. Tears freely streamed down both their faces.

He quickly looked around the stall. He noticed that when she fired the gun, she missed. It went into the left side of the stall. He figured she was shaking so bad from not having more than a t-shirt on, that she missed and it went over her head and into the stall wall on her left. He couldn't have been happier that she was shaking so badly. It saved her life.

"What the _hell_ were you thinking Alex? Nothing, _nothing_ in this world is worth doing that. I can't believe you would even seriously think about this, much less try to carry it out."

He lifted her head from his shoulder and held her face in his hands. With fresh tears streaming from his eyes, he looked in her tearful eyes and continued. "Alex you tried to kill my best friend. How could you? Do you know my life would have been over if you hadn't missed. I would have probably sat right here, held you in my lap, kissed you one last time, and turned that gun on myself. I cannot live without you Alex. Do you understand that? You are intoxicating to me and I am still as in love with you now as I was the day I asked you to marry me. How could you want to leave me Alex? I know Angela hurt you and I know she hurt you worse than you've ever been hurt in your life. I saw it in your eyes. Did you forget about that? Did you forget that I can see into your soul through your eyes? Did you forget how much I love you? Did you even think about how I would be able to live without you? Am I not important enough to you? Do you not love me enough to stay with me? Alex I'm hurt, I really am. I thought our love would get us through anything, but obviously I was wrong. I'm really sorry that I'm not enough of a reason for you to want to live. I thought I meant more to you, but again, I was wrong. I know you're hurting really bad Alex. But this isn't the answer. You leaving me here like this is _not_ the answer. I love you too much. I need you. I cannot raise that child without you. I cannot live without you. I don't know what I've done for you to not even consider how I'd feel if you did this, but I'm sorry Alex, I really am."

She looked at him and flung herself on him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed with every ounce of strength in her. She began crying harder. She pulled her head off of his shoulder and looked him in the eyes, still holding onto him tightly, she pressed her lips to his, hard. She kissed him with everything she had in her. When she finally drew back, she looked at him.

"I didn't think Walker. All I thought about was how much she hates me, how much she doesn't want to ever talk to me again, and how she wishes I wasn't her mother." She said as she continued crying. "But Walker, I love you more than anything in this world. I didn't think about that. I didn't think about anything except what she said. I'm so sorry. I really am. I didn't even think about how you would feel. All I was feeling was my pain. I just can't believe she said those things to me. That's my little girl. I carried her in my body for 9 months. I gave birth to her. I've loved her unconditionally, and I will never quit loving her. But for her to tell me those things, it hurt. But I guess I just feel like she spoke the truth. She said everything that I've been thinking she feels. All she did was confirm what I've believed since this happened. It's my fault."

"Alex, honey, we need to get you some help…"

"Walker, please no. I don't want anymore people knowing about this. Please, I promise I'll talk to you. I'll let you help me."

"Alex, this is against my better judgment, but okay. I want you to get better; I don't want you hurting like this. You need to learn that this isn't your fault. But, please honey, you have to come to me when you're hurting. Come to me when you're upset. You know I'll help you any way I can. And no matter what you think, don't you forget that I love you. That will never, ever change."

She looked at him and nodded. She sunk down in his embrace, and for the first time since he got out there, he really noticed how bad she was shivering. "C'mon baby, let me carry you inside. You must be freezing." She nodded her head again and he picked her up, and then carried his precious burden to the house.

Once he got inside, he walked straight up the stairs toward their room. He pulled the covers back and tucked Alex into the middle of the bed. "Honey, I'm gonna go talk to Angela. Will you be okay for a few minutes?" "Yea." "Alright, you stay here and try to get warmed up some. I'll be right back."

Walker didn't get both feet in Angela's room before he was pounded with questions. "Daddy, I heard a gun go off. Where were you guys for so long and why did you carry Mommy up here?" Walker walked to the bed and set down beside her. "Whoa, Angel, Slow down. First of all, have you thought about what you said earlier to your mother?" "Yes sir. I'm sorry Daddy. I really am. I was just so mad. It's not fair. But I know it wasn't Mommy's fault. She'd never let anybody hurt me. Please tell her I'm sorry Daddy." "I think you should go do that Angel." "But wait a minute Daddy, what about my questions?"

"Well Angela, I'm not gonna lie to you. When you said what you said to your mom, you really hurt her feelings. Angela, you will probably never understand how much your mother loves you. She never imagined that you could say such things to her. You tore her to pieces and what you said to her hurt her worse than it would if it came from anyone else. You're very special to her. You've always been her baby girl, her pride and joy, her everything. Your mom went out in the barn and tried to hurt herself, which is what you heard. What took so long was us talking; I reminded her how much we need her. And I carried her up her because she's freezing cold. She was so upset after you yelled at her that she didn't grab her jacket. I bundled her up in the bed and told her I was coming to talk to you."

When Walker got done, Angela was near tears. She never realized that saying things she didn't mean could hurt someone so badly. She quickly thought back to what she had said. "Daddy?" "Yea?" Angela broke down crying. "Daddy I told her I wish she wasn't my Mommy. Daddy, please go tell her I'm sorry. I want her to still be my Mommy. She's the best Mommy in the whole world. I love her lots. Daddy, I love you, but I need my Mommy." "Well Angel, Why don't you go tell her?" "I can't. She's mad at me." "No she's not. I bet you she'd love it if you went in there and told her all that." "Will you go with me?" "Alright, c'mon." He picked Angela up and carried her into the master bedroom.

When he came in the room with Angela in his arms, Alex saw them and sunk deeper into the covers. She was too embarrassed to face Angela. Angela kicked her legs a little, letting Walker know that she wanted down. He let her go and she went running to the bed. Alex was shocked. This was a child, who thirty minutes ago, hated her. Angela hopped on the bed and sat on top of the covers in the middle, near Alex. Alex turned to look at her, unsure of what to do. The minute she caught her mother's eye, Angela began. "Mommy, I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad at me. I love you and you're the best Mommy in the whole world. I need you." Alex began to cry, for what she felt like was the millionth time that day. Angela continued on. "I know I said that I wish you weren't my Mommy, but it's just not true. I'm so sorry. I need you to color with me and to talk to me. And I love it when you let me help you cook supper. And when me and you and Daddy all play in the living room sometimes. I love it when you kiss me goodnight. And when you always listen to me. Mommy, you _really_ are the best. I'm sorry that you tried to hurt yourself because of me. Please still love me and be my Mommy, please."

When Angela finished, all three of them were crying. Walker sat on the edge of the bed. Alex reached from underneath the covers to pull Angela to her. Angela eagerly latched onto her mother. Angela looked back the minute she touched her mom. "Mommy, you're cold." Alex didn't care. She just smiled through the tears. She had her baby girl back. Angela moved the covers and slid under them, cuddling up to her mother, hoping to help warm her up. Walker smiled, grabbed another blanket and tossed it over them. He then moved the covers and slid in on the other side of Alex.

Alex lay on her back. She had Angela cuddled into her left side with her head resting in Alex's left shoulder, with Alex's arm around her. Angela's left arm was wound tightly around her mother's waist. She didn't want to ever leave her mom's side again. Walker lay on Alex's right side. He was as near to her as possible, trying to warm her up. He was lying on his left side, holding her right hand with his left. He took his right arm and pulled the covers up to the three of them, and then protectively laid his arm across both of his girls.

They all laid there for a few minutes, until Alex finally spoke. "I love the two of you so much. I don't know what I'd ever do without either of you." Walker squeezed her hand. "Honey, we love you too. Angela was right; you _are_ the best mother in the world. You're also the best wife and friend that any man could ask for and I'm eternally thankful that I was lucky enough to find you Alex." He looked up to see unshed tears and gently reached up to her and kissed them away. He then took his left hand out of her hand and put it behind her head. She took her right hand and put it on his head, drawing him to her. They began to kiss each other with a passion. They completely forgot where they were and most importantly, who else was there. Suddenly, a little voice spoke up. "Ewwwww! Y'all are gross. Mommy, Daddy is a boy, _why_ are you kissing him?" Alex and Walker broke apart, giggles amongst them both. "Because I _like_ to kiss him Angela." "Do you kiss other boys too?" Walker cut in, "She better not!" Alex laughed. "No baby girl, the only boy I'm ever gonna kiss is your daddy." Angela rolled her eyes. "But it's just so gross!" Walker reached over and ticked Angela in her ribcage, and soon the entire Walker household erupted in laughter.


	11. ONCE

Walker finally looked at his watch. "Hey y'all, it's almost 1:00, what do y'all say we go eat that lunch now?" "Yea Daddy, let's eat. I'm hungry!" The family got out of the bed and made their way downstairs. Walker went to warm up the food while the girls prepared the table. Once the food is warm, Walker comes around with the pan, dishing out proportions to the three plates. After one scoop of Hamburger Helper on Alex's plate, she tells Walker that's enough. "Alex, you need…" "Walker, please work with me, okay?" He eyeballs her, but does as she wishes. The family sits down and discusses the upcoming holidays. Fifteen minutes later, Walker notices all three plates are clean. He takes a second look. "I see you ate all your food Alex. Want some more?" "No, Walker. Give me time." Walker looks to her, then to Angela. "Hey Baby girl, why don't you go on upstairs and play in your room for a little bit. Mommy and I will come up there in a few minutes." "Okay, Daddy!" Angela hops down from her chair, goes to her daddy and gives him a peck on the cheek. She then goes to her mother wraps her arms around her really tight. "Well what was all that for?" Walker questions his daughter. "Because I love y'all.", and she hurriedly exits the room.

Walker looks to Alex. "Alright honey, I'm giving you time. I'm working with you. But please baby, you have to meet me halfway too. I cannot stand to see you eat so little like this all the time. Sitting there watching you eat almost nothing breaks my heart in two. I just want you to be happy and healthy. You'll come to me for anything, right?" Alex looks at him, her eyes showing a mixture of annoyance and love. He's bothering her to death about everything, but she knows the man does it out of love. Love for her. "Yes, right now, I just want you to hold me." He stands and goes to her, grabbing her hand "Okay honey, let's go in the living room, the dishes can wait for later."

Once they are seated and she is in his arms, she speaks. "I know you keep telling me the opposite and despite the recent turn of events, I just can't seem to get it out of my head that it's all my fault. I'm trying Walker, I really am!" "You just keep right on trying baby. You'll do it. You're strong. I have faith in you. It's not your fault. God, I love you Alex. Do you know that? I feel like I cannot tell you enough. I feel like I've failed you in some way. Please, if you never remember anything else, always remember how much I love you. How important you are and how much you mean to me."

She sighs and turns in his arms slightly. "You've done no such thing. You've always been there for me, even when I've been my own worst enemy. And I'll never forget it. I love you too. More than you'll ever know." She leans toward him and they kiss each other with a renewed passion. Their hands began roaming all over each other's bodies as the kiss intensifies. Suddenly, Walker stops. "We'd better stop. It's the middle of the day and Angela's right up stairs." Alex backs away a little as well, "yea, you're right." They lean back in the previous position as he holds her in his arms.

They suddenly hear a loud thump, followed by a scream, then Angela crying. They both jump up, making a run for the stairs. As they enter the room, they see Angela lying on the floor, curled up like a fetus, crying. Alex rushes to her, picks up her up and her screaming intensifies. As Alex sits on the bed with her, she notices Angela holding her private parts. Walker notices it as well, as he comments, "Baby, what's wrong!"

In between all the crying she answers, "I tripped… and fell. I landed… where they hurt me… on the floor." Walker looks to where she was previously laying. Indeed, there was a Barbie car lying near where she fell. Alex reacts instantly. "Honey, you need to let Mommy look at it." Angela nods her head as Alex lays her on the bed. Alex goes to unzip her jeans and Angela stops her. "Mommy… Please make Daddy leave. He's… a boy." She sobs. Alex looks to Walker as he takes his cue and exits the room to wait in the hallway.

As Alex undoes Angela's clothing, she sees the deep bruising and gasps. It's been a few days since the incident and the bruises are at their worst. Alex looks at everything and determines that Angela will be fine, she just irritated the bruises. Alex is deeply disturbed by what she saw, but puts on a brave façade for her daughter. She orders Walker, who's listening from the hallway, to get some of Angela's pain medicine. Alex pulls Angela's clothes back up and gently picks her up and holds her. Angela's crying has begun to cease a little as Alex waits for the medicine.

Walker finally brings it and administers it to Angela. As it makes Angela drowsy, Alex lays back on the bed with her. Walker sits at the foot of the bed, keeping a vigil over them until Angela finally falls asleep. Once she's asleep, each parent kisses her lightly on the forehead and leaves her to rest. They walk to their room, where Alex begins to digest the horror her mind forced her to replay a few moments ago.


	12. TWELVE

Alex enters their bedroom and sits on the bed. Walker doesn't know what she has seen, so he stands at the door, waiting for her to speak. She stares at him with cold eyes. Where Walker would usually see a vibrant, happy, loving personality in those eyes; all he was seeing was cold, sad, dreadful eyes. "Walker, I… I just… Walker, I was there. I was there when they did that. My god Walker, I was there. I couldn't stop them. I wanted to. I tried. Walker I would have lain down my life. They had a gun over her heart. They were gonna kill my baby Walker. I tried to help her. I just, I've failed her as her mother."

By this time, Alex rose from the bed and began pacing around the room. She was getting very agitated with herself. Walker walked near the foot of the bed and just listened. He listened to her vent all her frustrations. "Mothers should protect their children. Hell, it's the age old tradition 'mother protects her young'. There are animals out there that can protect their young better than I can protect my child. Angela looks to me to protect her. How can I live with myself Walker? I've failed you too. You trust me to take care of her just like I trust you to take care of her. God Walker, I've failed the two most important people in my life. What kind of person am I? How can I face her everyday for the rest of my life? How can I face you? What if we ever have more children? Oh god Walker, We can't have any more. I've already screwed up the one I have. Walker, don't you see? I'm a mess. Please Walker, do something with me. Get rid of me. Please."

When Alex was done talking, she'd fallen to the bed again, banging her fists into the pillows and sobbing her heart out. Walker gently went to her. He sat on the bed beside her and turned her toward him. She continued to swing her fists. He pulled his sobbing wife to his chest, where she continued to swing her fists. He pulled her in a little tighter whispering soothing words and soon, her arms ceased to swing. Her sobs turned into small cries.

"You can live with yourself and you will. You will do it because you're strong. You will do it because one day you will realize that _maybe_ what got Angela through that night, was knowing her mother was there beside her. You are a beautiful person. You're a smart, intelligent, loving person. You're an amazing person. You can face her everyday for the rest of your life because you know she wants to face you everyday for the rest of hers. And baby, you can _always _face me. I don't care what you do, how you do it, or where you do it; as far as I'm concerned, you're the first person I wanna face. Alex, we can have more children. If you ever want to, I'm ready. You haven't _screwed_ up Angela. Alex what are you always telling the ladies in your support group about it not being their fault? I say it's high time you took your own advice. Angela is going to be fine, you wait and see. 30 years from now, will she remember how scared she was that night? I doubt it, Angela will remember you, Alex. Don't you see? She will remember you being there. She will remember you holding her hand. So many people would have left. So many mothers would have done so many things different. Alex you were there. Angela will look back 30 years from now; she will remember her mother lying over her. She will remember you holding her hand. She'll remember you lying down in that hospital bed and holding her. She'll remember you coloring with her after a bad nightmare. Alex, she will remember how you held her in your lap and comforted her just now. Angela is fine. She's strong, just like her mother."

Alex began to calm down considerably. Walker looked at her. She looked like an innocent school child. "And _get rid _of you? Not on your life Alex Walker!" She looked up at him and a small smile emerged. "There it is. What was that, a smile? That's my girl." She giggled at this. "I love you Cordell Walker. You always know what I need to hear. You're always calming my fears. You are amazing!" "Well I happen to think you're pretty amazing yourself, Mrs. Walker."

The couple began to kiss each other, falling into a horizontal position. Their hands roamed all over each other's bodies. In the middle of the afternoon, with a child asleep in her room, they took the opportunity. They made love and fell into a blissful afternoon nap.

Several hours later, they woke. Alex felt renewed and refreshed. It still amazed her; what a simple lovemaking session with her husband could do for her spirits. Well, not simple, she thought; but nonetheless she felt a lot better.

She looked to see her husband lying next to her, staring at her. She smiled into his eyes and rolled over into his warm embrace. "Alex, I could lie here staring at you forever and never tire of it. Your beauty is not only skin deep, but reaches into your soul as well. I still don't know how I ever got so lucky. But I know I thank God and the spirits every day for making you a part of my life, a part I can't live without." This statement earned him a kiss on the cheek and a wife who couldn't seem to snuggle deep enough into his embrace.

After lying there staring at each other for a while, the couple decided they should go see about their child. They each got up and got dressed. They walked into Angela's room only to find it empty. Walker searched the rooms upstairs while Alex looked downstairs, each parent going room to room calling out to their child. When no answer came from anywhere, Alex's first reaction was to panic. She went to the bottom of the stairs

"WALKER!" He came running down the stairs. "Oh my god Walker, where is she. Walker, where's my baby. Walker, we have to find her." He held her at an arm's length with a firm grip on her shoulders. "Alex, calm down. Let's go check the barn." It was nearing 7:00pm, and was dark outside. They needed a flashlight to guide their way. Walker grabbed the one by the door with one hand, and grabbed onto Alex's hand with the other.

They ran out the house and across the yard. They walked into the barn searching through the stalls. When they got to the last stall, Angel's stall, they heard snoring. They took a closer look. There behind the horse, sat a sleeping Angela. Alex let go of Walker's hand and made a beeline for the child. She picked her up and gently shook her, "Angela, Angela, baby wake up."

Angela awoke, looking at her mother. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "Mommy, what are we doing in the barn?" Walker stepped around Alex and looked at Angela. "We were hoping you could answer that for us Angela. You know the rules about coming outside without us." "But I didn't daddy. I swear. I was lying in Mommy's lap. Mommy you didn't bring me out here?" "No, Angel. I did not bring you out here. Neither did your father." "Angela, are you telling us the truth?" Angela was getting irritated. She did not walk out there. "Yes daddy!"

She kicked and squirmed to let Alex know she wanted down. Alex put her down and she looked up at them and began to cry. "I did _not_ come out here by myself. I _know_ the rules and I'm _not_ lying!" She stormed off, running for the fields. Walker looked at Alex, smiling. "She has her mother's temper. God, I love that." "Shut up, Walker and help me chase her. It's too cold and dark out here for this."

The Walker's took off at a run after their daughter. Alex got to her first and picked the squirming child up. "Angela, calm down baby girl. No one said you were lying." "Yeahuh, Dadd..." Alex cut her off. "Hush Angela, let's go inside and look at that medicine prescription." Angela sank down into her mother's embrace. "I'm sorry. I just got so mad. I don't like being called a liar."

Sshh baby girl, no one said you were lying. It's okay. It's all gonna be okay." "Okay Mommy. Mommy, I'm cold." Alex gripped the girl tighter. "I know baby. It's a little chilly out here. What do you say we make some hot chocolate when we get inside?" "Mmmm, I love hot chocolate. But I love you more. You're the best. You always protect me from daddy when I'm in trouble."

Alex laughed. "Honey, your father and I want nothing but the best for you. I promise you, anytime you're in trouble; we believe that you will learn from your punishment. But I agree, sometimes daddy's a little too strict. And I love you too; you're my angel from heaven."

Walker was walking behind them and interrupted with a joking side to his voice. "Hi, you two, I hate to interrupt your mother-daughter moment, but y'all _do_ know I hear y'all talking about me." Alex turned around and looked him, then to Angela. Both girls giggled and continued walking to the house.


	13. thirteen

Once inside, Walker checked the prescription labels. Nothing indicated a side effect of sleep walking. Alex and Angela went to the office where Alex began searching online. "Walker, it says here that a lot of children sleep walk. Apparently, Angela will most likely grow out of it. Until then..." Walker interjected, "We fix it so she can't get out when we're all asleep." Angela jumped in the conversation, "So what's going on Daddy?" "Well baby girl, you're sleep-walking. That means you walk around like you're awake, but you don't know it because you're really still asleep." "Whaaaat, Daddy? You're not making any sense!!" Angela had a very perplexed and confused look on her face.

Alex explained, "It means you might wake up and not be in your bed and you might not remember getting out your bed. But don't you worry about it, because your daddy and I are gonna make sure you can't go outside again, okay baby?" "Alright, Mommy." And just like that, Angela skipped to away to the living room.

Alex sighed and leaned back in her chair. It had been such a long and eventful day. She had been a prosecutor for many years, had her share of run-ins with angry felons and spent more than enough time worrying about Walker's job detail. But never in her life could she recall having such a long, dreadful, painful, tearful and worrisome day. She knew her emotions were currently all over the place and she wasn't exactly sure what to do with that. Walker sat in the loveseat that also occupied her office and held out his hand. Alex got up and sat on the small couch with him, she cuddled into his side. Alex continued to stare aimlessly, while reminiscing the day's events. Walker kissed her head, "Penny for your thoughts, lady?"

"I was just trying to figure out how I got here. 72 hours ago, my biggest worry was 'when did the milk expire?' and now I have a child that will never have children of her own. My thoughts, feelings and emotions are so jumbled up right now that I just don't know whether the clock is spinning or the toilet is ticking. I know I did my damnest to help her and I'm still trying so hard to be strong for her, but I can't help but wonder when did it quit being enough? I'm wondering when that quit being enough to keep her safe and when did that quit being enough to keep me sane. I'm feeling pretty broken, Walker. I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with my guilt, but I've just got to do so much better than this, better than today. And when I think about what I tried to do out there in the barn, then waking up today and Angela not being in her room. My heart almost stopped when she wasn't there. It helped me to realize that I need to be here, I have to keep protecting her and loving her. I cannot imagine not watching that beautiful child grow up. I hurt; my heart physically hurts at the thought of not being able to hug her every day, not being able to kiss you every day. I don't really know how I managed to get that low today. I've got so much guilt Walker; I'm going to have to learn how to cope."

Alex quickly wiped at the few tears that had fallen and laid her head in his lap. He began to slowly run his fingers through her hair. "You're going to do just fine, Alex. I've got faith in you and I know if anyone can overcome this, you can. I wish I knew what to say to put you back together, but the truth is, I'm feeling a little broken myself. I was so scared when you guys didn't make it home the other night. When I found out who had the two of you, I wondered if I'd ever see either of you alive again. Those men were ruthless, Alex. They took no shame in what they did and didn't play any kind of favorites. The fact that what they did to a child would upset the mother only urged them on. I'm so sorry I didn't get there quicker, but I'm glad I was the one who walked outta that room with a family that night. I can't begin to imagine what you're feeling, to have been there holding her hand while they did that to her, but unable to help her. I'm not even sure if I could be strong enough to deal with what you had to see, but I just know that somehow, you're going to come out on top. We're all hurting and dealing with our pain right now, but I know the three of us will make it through this."

Alex looked up at him and smiled through unshed tears. Walker was never known for sharing his feelings, but when he did, he always amazed her. He never ceased to sooth and calm her in times of worry. She knew she had a long road ahead of her, but with this man at her side, all was possible. They sat on the loveseat for a few more minutes before getting up to ready Angela for bed. It was decided Angela would sleep between them tonight, until Walker could get to the hardware store tomorrow. Locks would be installed at the top of the door. They decided not to show Angela how to work the locks, because the website said that even while asleep, a sleep-walker is still able to maneuver as if awake. Walker and Alex weren't sure whether or not the recent events set off this new sleep-walking thing, but could only hope this was the worst of their current problems.


	14. Fourteen

"ANGELA!"

Alex shot up in the bed in the middle of the night. Walker and Angela were instantly awakened by her screams. Before either could attempt to console her, she threw off the covers and darted for the restroom. Walker quickly looked at Angela, "Stay here." He pushed aside his covers and went after her. By the time he made it to the restroom, Alex was on her knees retching over the toilet. He kneeled beside her, holding back her hair and rubbing her back. She finally collapsed back away from the toilet bowl, resting on the hard tile floor of the bathroom. Walker reached up to the sink, filled a cup with water and handed it to her. She rinsed out her mouth, leaning up to spit the water in the toilet.

"Thank you" she said as she wiped her mouth and leaned her head back against the wall in exhaustion. Walker gave her a look of concern, "What happened honey? Do you wanna talk about it?" She looked back at him with watery eyes, shaking her head, "No, I really don't wish to discuss it… but it was just graphic Walker, so very graphic. It made me sick on my stomach. It wasn't just a dream, Walker. I was reliving it." He sat beside her, running his fingers through her hair, "Oh baby, I'm so sorry, so very sorry. If there was anything I could do to take those images and memories from you, I would do it in a heartbeat." She sniffled a bit and leaned her head against him in an attempt to calm down, "I know you would honey… but I would only want to take the images back from you to reduce your own pain, and then we'd just be in a vicious cycle. I just have to learn to accept this deck of cards life's thrown at us and attempt to not crumble in the process."

Sitting beside her, Walker wrapped his arm up around her head and leaned in to kiss her brow, "That sounds like a great plan, baby. You think you're ready to get back in the bed now? It's only 3:30… we can still cuddle with Angela for a few hours before we all need to get up." She smiled at him as he proceeded to get up, and then assist her up from the floor, "Yea, that sounds good… you go on, I'll brush my teeth and be right there. Walker trekked back to the bed and climbed in. His thoughts were in a whirlwind. He laid down beside Angela and thought about the trials and tribulations his family would be facing for years to come, and all because his girls just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. So often, there was a motive behind the people that came after the Walker family, but in this instance, there was none. Walker was pondering whether or not that worse when Alex slowly entered the room and came to the bed. In the moonlight, he could see the worry on her face, the tracks of tears that had incessantly fallen over the last several days. He vowed to himself then and there that he would see his family through this if it was the last thing he did.

As her parents adjusted themselves to get comfortable in the bed, Angela woke from the slight dozing she'd done after hearing her mother running from the bed a few minutes earlier. She snuggled close into her mother's side, asking, "Are you okay, Mommy?" Alex grinned back at her little girl… such the replica of her father, always concerned for others. "I'm fine sweetheart. You feeling okay? You don't need any medicine do you?" With the extent of Angela's internal injuries, Alex was amazed at the small amount of pain medicine Angela required… but again 'She's her father's daughter.' Alex thought to herself. "No, Mommy… I just wanna be here with you and Daddy. Please don't leave me alone." Alex and Walker exchanged looks of sympathy. Walker replied first, "We won't leave you alone baby girl. You're safe right here between Mommy and me. We'll always keep you safe." Alex found his statement to be slightly ironic considering the circumstances… but smiled in reassurance to Angela anyway.

Angela continued to squirm around, unable to settle herself back to sleep… even though both parents were right next to her. In an attempt to calm both his girls' nerves, Walker gently lifted Angela and laid her across his chest, settling her head over his beating heart to reassure her he was there. He then reached his arm out to Alex, drawing her to him as well. She cuddled into his left side, putting her head on that side of his chest, facing Angela. Both girls smiled at each other, and Alex draped her arm across Angela to rub her back. Walker held them both close to him, and looked toward the heavens, thanking the spirits they were in his arms. Eventually the entire family dozed off, cuddled together in the bed.

The next morning came and went quickly. Walker, the typical early riser, woke up before Alex and Angela. He gently disengaged himself from them, laid Angela back down next to Alex, where the two instantly cuddled together in their sleep. His heart overflowed with love for them. He quietly leaned over, pressing quick kisses to each forehead and walked out the room. That was the slowest part of his morning. He tended to the animals outside and washed his truck. He sat on the porch and had a chat with Trivette, who'd come to check up on his closest friends and bring Walker the locks to secure the house so Angela couldn't get out in the event of her sleepwalking; and even had Trivette fill him in on some of the cases they'd been working on before tragedy struck. He went down to the basement and got in a great work out; he'd been unable to catch one these last few days and he had to admit to himself how very therapeutic the work out was.

Alex and Angela decided to join the living around noon, coming down the stairs in search of food. Walker knew they'd be down soon and had soup and salad almost ready for them. "Well good morning and welcome to the world of the living my beautiful rays of sunshine; how are the two of you today?" Alex smiled and Angela giggled in response, "We're hungry, Daddy!" "Well that's good, because I've got Grandpa CD's old chicken soup recipe coming right up!" Angela smiled and sat at her chair, taking a sip of the milk Walker already had set out for her. Walker went up to Alex and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her soundly on the mouth. She slowly began to moan back at him, then lightly pushed him away, raising her eyes and darting them to Angela in an effort to remind him they weren't alone. He grinned back at her and Angela giggled again. "Well, Walker, if cooking makes you this happy, I may have to let you spend some more time in the kitchen!" Suggestive looks were passed between the two before the family settled down to eat.

As they finished lunch, the phone rang and Walker answered it. "Yep, alright, tomorrow at one. She'll be there. Thanks, bye." Alex looked at him concerned, "Who was that?"

"That was the doctor's office, calling to remind you about your six month check up tomorrow."

"Walker, I really don't think that's necessary right now, other things are more important… I'll call them and reschedule…"

Before she could get up and get to the phone, Walker grabbed her, twirling her back to plop in his lap. "There's nothing more important than either your or Angela's health. Baby, you _know_ how I feel about this. You _need_ to go... especially after all this. Please do it. For me." The pleading look in his eyes and her resolve crumbled. Ever since Angela had been born and they both nearly died, Walker was adamant about Alex receiving her biannual check up. He made it his personal mission to make sure both Alex and Angela stayed in tiptop health; he wanted them around for a long time. She smiled at him, "Alright, for you."

The afternoon went by much more leisurely in their house. Angela decided she needed some pain medicine, so after giving her a dose, Alex laid down with her on the couch to watch television for a while. Walker went to work securing the new locks out of Angela's reach on the doors. After he finished, Walker entered the living room to see Alex and Angela asleep. He turned off the television and quietly covered them. He stared at them for a moment and tears ran down his face. Alex had leaned on him as a strong pillar of support throughout this whole ordeal, but he was mad. He was furious, so furious that he didn't even know what to do. How could anyone be so sadistic as to do this to a little girl? How could anyone ruin such a small child of her innocence? How could they tear apart his wife's beautiful soul like that… damn it, he almost lost her the other day in the barn! Walker didn't remember a time in his life when he was this angry with an enemy he couldn't settle things with… for he already settled it that night in the hotel room… but Walker's heart was far from settled. How could people be so inhumane? He ran his hand through Alex's hair, tucking it behind her ear and went to the basement. Maybe a few rounds with the punching bag would help.


End file.
